When I Said Yes

You’d visit me, in my sleep, and even when I woke, like a knight to the rescue. You would ask me the same question, and I would reply with the same answer, “no”. I would tell you I wasn’t ready, I didn’t believe in me. I was just terrified, convinced I couldn’t live up to […]

When I Knew The Greatest Love

When I told my friends of his decision, they asked whether he was having a midlife crisis, stress at work maybe, or was there another woman, anything to support me. But, none of this could dilute the fact that he had made a decision, his own decision. My friends were angry, but why wasn’t I? […]

When I Was Successful

I’ve started blogs, projects, jobs, careers. I’ve also ceased to continue them and in doing so, I felt as though I had failed. But every decision I made was calculated and meticulously thought out. I stopped my Tumblr blog because I didn’t enjoy the platform and I no longer felt connected to my words. I took a break until […]

Pieces

Some days she’s whole some days, pieces scattered. Her whole life she would spend piecing herself together.

When I Used To Be

Far too often I find myself saying, “when I was younger, I used to be a runner, singer, writer, performer, creator.” I used to be. I used to be. Yes, I used to just be. So freely, without hesitation. But you know what, that was a long time ago now. I’m not that carefree child anymore. […]

Grown

Oh my darling, you are not who you were in high school, when you were 21. You are evolving. Your body, your mind, your soul – always evolving. And today my darling, you are grown.

When I Was More Than Enough

I’ve officially marked two weeks of my sabbatical. Initially, I felt as though I spent most of the days thinking a lot and doing very little. I said I was in the ‘ideation’ phase so thinking was part of the process. But then I thought, and thought and overthought and then started overthinking about how much I was […]

When She Looked

She saw the universe, in her own eyes.

Fears of Fear Itself

I began last week in a perpetual state of fear. I was paralysed by it. The more I fought to shake it off, the more it began to consume me. Fear is one hell of a gluttonous beast. My rescue, as it has so often before, arrived through my words. It began with hesitant, shaky scribbles but soon enough the strength returned to […]

Here.

You’re not precious Self. You will hurt. You need to feel it. You’re not alone Self. You will find others. You need to let them in. You’re not lost Self. You’re right here. You never even left.