Where I am

I am 30 and some months. I am unmarried, un-partnered, un-mortgaged, without child. I am living back with my parents. I own very little of anything. I am dealing with my anxieties – of being unmarried, un-partnered, un-mortgaged, without child. of living back with my parents. of owning very little of anything. But, I am […]

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What I Carry

As I’ve written before, I owe so much to my heartbreak. It was the shakeup I needed to makeup with my Self. But now, after all has settled, I can see the aftermath. My heartbreak has left me with baggage, at least a little carry on suitcase. I don’t trust so easy. H was kind, […]

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My Fears

Recently my fears were running rampant. I tried fending them off but this only seemed to make them more feral. So, I decided I would just invite them in, and allow them to be heard. And I listened. I fear that: maybe the reason why I have no idea what I’m doing is because I […]

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Who I Am Today

In order to provide any insight on who I am today, I need to pay homage to who I was, and who I had become. I was – a happy kid, a dreamer, curious, fidgety, dramatic, creative, engaged, fearless, loving and oh so loved. I had dreams, big dreams. I wanted to spread positivity, create […]

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In My Darkness

It was for about three years that I truly experienced my darkness. I grew accustomed to it, that even in my physical world I’d keep my house dimly lit, preferring the blinds drawn, the light too offensive. I feared my darkness but I also loved it, making for a volatile relationship. It kept me company, […]

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When I Said Yes

You’d visit me, in my sleep, and even when I woke, like a knight to the rescue. You would ask me the same question, and I would reply with the same answer, “no”. I would tell you I wasn’t ready, I didn’t believe in me. I was just terrified, convinced I couldn’t live up to […]

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When I Was Rescued

You didn’t have to. You could have watched me stay, because I believed I had to. Watched me struggle, because I felt I had no choice. Watched me stop dreaming, because I had stopped believing. You could have watched until the fire in my eyes dimmed, starved of all hope, trust, belief. But, you didn’t, because you knew – it’s the fire, which makes me, keeps me, […]

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